21st April 2016. I was reading your notebook earlier today. This time a year ago we would have been settling down to sleep. You had spent your final carefree worry free day on this earth. Storm clouds are gathering as we move into that God awful time when a year ago it became increasingly apparent that #BastardCancer had entered our lives. I'm so sick and tired and weary of feeling so dreadful. So worn out by the pain of missing you. So tired of smiling and laughing when I'm so shattered inside. I can't even come close to explaining how dreadful I feel when the realisation hits me again and again that you aren't coming home :(